I don’t have much time to write but on December 16th, my new baby boy was born! It was a fast delivery and he is hale and hearty. Things are a little crazy at home with him and my 20 month old daughter. She’s slowly adjusting to her new family and isn’t too upset if mommy can’t be with her all the time. She’s slowly learning that daddy is fun to play with too! We’re dealing with some gas issues, a reversal of days and nights, and a fussy time that occurs around 8pm to 1pm. Other than that, we’re doing well! We have a night doula who comes at night to help put the little man back to sleep. On the days that she’s here, all I do is feed him and she does the rest. I don’t mind the night feedings, it’s the putting him back down to sleep that takes over an hour each time! So I’m so relieved when she’s here. The days that she’s not here I suffer a lot of anxiety since I’m doing it on my own. As much as DH has offered to help me, it’s better that he gets his sleep to deal with the energetic little girl. At least one of us needs to be well rested to deal effectively with her! DH has taken three weeks off so I should be using him to his fullest potential. Unfortunately he also has a cold (as does DD, now DS and possibly even me). DD is in daycare during the week but the centre has been closed during the holidays so she’s home more with us and getting bored. Even her new toys can’t keep her attention for long it seems and it’s too damn cold outside to do anything with her there for any length of time. So I’m slowly getting use to having an infant around again. I can’t stand this infancy period. It’s full of uncertainty and anxiety. I”ll be happier when he’s a little older. But nursing is going pretty well (just one ruined side) and I haven’t had the blues like I did with DD. This I’m happy about! There’s a big difference between the blues from last time and occasional anxiety attacks. I can deal better with the anxiety. Duty calls and I”ll write more if there’s time!
PS. Update! I can’t remember all that happened but I’ll write here about his birth. I had been stretched twice by my OB leading up to his birth. It was the day before his due date. For a week I was having erratic contractions. The intensity was increasing but I still couldn’t predict when they’d come. I knew the time was near so I made sure to get sleep Thursday night. My mom was staying with us all week luckily. At one in the morning they started to really hit me hard. At two it was too hard to sleep but they weren’t close together enough. I kept trying to sleep between contractions. At four I was pacing like a caged tiger and I woke up my husband and mom. Then all of a sudden my contractions were coming so fast I couldn’t recover from one before the other started. When I called the hospital the contractions were two minutes apart consistently. They told me to come in. By the time I got to the mat ward, the contractions all but stopped! I was waiting in the hall for some time and was worried they would check me and send me home. After waiting ten minutes (after 5am), they called me in to triage. I stood up and my water broke like a tidal wave! I was so embarrassed because I was soaked! They put me in a room right away and I was four centimeters dilated. My nurse gave me oxitocen (sp?) to help bring the contractions back. I wasn’t sure I wanted an epidural this time but the contractions came so hard that I quickly changed my mind (and DH was going to kill me). Once I was comfortable, my nurse was taken away to surgery. My next nurse stayed for an hour. Then nobody came for a long time. They were very short staffed again. I finally called the nurse to make sure I wasn’t forgotten. I can’t remember her name but she was great. I was given oxygen since baby was in a little distress again. My doctor, Dr. Peters came in and was surprised to see a familiar face. She was called back by the nurse at 9:30am. Apparently I rapidly dilated to ten centimeters and we couldn’t believe they wanted me to start pushing. The epidural worked amazingly this time. I felt nothing! Baba stayed in the room to watch, which was a little creepy. The doctor thought baby would be here around lunch. So mom and my brother left to walk around. DH told his parents to come at lunch. Well, the nurse kept repositioning me and using warm compresses to stop the tearing (I did a little). At 10:00am, my son was born at 8lbs 2oz and 21″ and placed on my chest. I couldn’t believe it! They didn’t clean him up much and it too two more days before they finally cleaned him up. He had the cord around his neck like DD did so he didn’t cry at first and the nurse said he had a big head. Gee, thanks! Ryan couldn’t find my family so he had to text them (they were walking around). We had to call DH’s parents to come early. DH went to get DD from daycare and stayed home with her until she fell asleep. Then he stayed with me at the hospital. He left at six in the morning to be home when DD woke up. He stayed with her all Saturday until I came home. He sent mom to stay with me. He was scared of leaving me alone. We had a sleepless night of course. There apparently weren’t any chair/beds for DH so he slept sitting up. At one point I held DS in a chair so hubby could sleep a bit in my bed. It was hectic at the hospital since it was so short staffed. I didn’t even get breakfast the next day because my chart was wrong (no food order). It was ridiculous. This is my second delivery at the same hospital and I left feeling let down again. I came home after the first night because I missed DD and because I was in a private room and was scared where they would have moved me if I stayed. Also, he started choking in the next morning when I was alone. I hit the panic button to get help and grabbed him. I put him on his side and he spat out a ball of mucous. Because he was born so fast, the mucous in his chest didn’t get squeezed out and they don’t aspirate anymore.
When we came home, the house was a mess since DH didn’t have time to clean. DD was hysterical when she saw me. She wouldn’t stop crying and wouldn’t let me put her down for a second. She wasnt interested in her brother. I rocked her on the couch singing ‘I love you, you love me’ until she calmed down. It was an awful homecoming. Worse then when I came home after my arm surgery! Of course she was younger then. I spent the whole time away from home thinking of DD and telling DS about her.
Since then, my DD has been over the moon with her brother. She loves to hug and kiss him. She smothers him at every opportunity. I’m so proud of what I went through and of my two babies!
